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Sat
23	And his phone is out, so he can not fix the flip for the Dialy Splash over at taxi1010.com first time in forever that that has happened.
Dec 05	It is no longer Christmas eve eve but Christmas Eve and I received the best present of all my brother, Richard, phoned me. He said, it is so important for us to live a certain way right now. To be ourselves more than ever and that feeling of being ashamed and low or low down feeling, the dark, or maybe he didn't say dark but I know what he meant. He was talking about that feeling of embarassment, feeling small, ashamed, that secret, sort of lonely feeling, He said listen to that little voice, say to it, oh I'm so glad you are here I'm listening to you, if you welcome that voice, that's where the magic comes from. The magic. or was it power, No it was Genie! the Genie!! The Magic Genie. That is the best thing I've heard all day.

Thursday
22
Dec	For a bead to really be successful, it not only has to be a thing of beauty but it must also be friendly with the camera. I have many beads that a wonderful to hold and behold and at the same time do not photograph well. A person who buys such a bead is pleasantly suprised when the bead arrives in the mail. However, some beads photograph better than they really are. I do my best to have the pictures acurately reflect the bead, but it is a tight rope walk. The lighting must be just so. That bead must be seeable on the computer screen sometimes to do that you make the image of the bead look less like what it really is like. its a judgement call for sure. I have two beads this morning that are not camera friendly.

10:16 pm

I tried to go to bed to early, I don't know why I ever do that, it never works. I thought oh boy I'm really tired and it's 7:30 if I can go to sleep now I can wake up at 6 a.m. and get some exercize before I take Sam to school. right. oh well. I have some spectacular beads in the kiln I can not wait to pull them out, they are the best ones I've ever made. (I think this every day, and some days I pull them out and I'm just as excited, more excited about them than I was when I made them, but many many mornings when I pull them out I am a little mistified at how I could have thought they were going to be so richious.) but these, these, I wish I could pull them out right now....

Wed	Winter Solstice, the longest night of the year least amount of sunlight. It is very significant to me. The temperature in Raleigh today was supposed to be up to 47degrees Fahrenheit. I made several beads today between 12 noon and 5:30 pm. It really is like Christmas each morning that I have beads in the kiln. You never really know how they will turn out. I always think they will be fantastic beads the best I've ever made and I find the next day a completely different bead than I expected but still whatever it turns out to be, I have a feeling of acceptance, like, well, sure, I knew that this color would do this, and the overall design and color combination would turn out like that.
Dec
21st

Tuesday
20	Doesn't it feel like Wednesday? So my newest love in life is the character James Spader plays on Boston Legal, Allen Shore, he reminds me of my husband. And the sleazy lawyer judge character Eugene Young played by the talented (he must be or I hope he is, because I detest this character) Steve Harris reminds me of my first husband. Anyway, I want Allen Shore (a very small version of him, or just his voice) to sit on my shoulder and be on retainer for the rest of my life, to feed me lines when I need them. This character is the berries times ten thousand. If you have never seen Boston Legal or the Practice, what are you waiting for, I've told you it's great now go out and rent the box set or set your tibo. Denny Crane. and I'm schmidt. From now on when you read my blog, read it in Allen Shore's voice, or David Spader's.

Dec.
Monday
19	My son dreamt about Bears, Terradactiles and Cheetahs last night. I had some real beauties come out of the kiln.